One of the issues that arises in the discussion of marriage and is a topic of debate among families is the issue of dowry. What needs to be emphasized is that the dowry is the responsibility of the man upon whom the marriage contract is established. It is possible that after the marriage, the dowry may be exaggerated or reduced, and its legal and forgiving aspects come into play. However, it is obligatory for the man on whom the marriage is established to fulfill it. Even if he does not fulfill it and passes away, first he must be held accountable in repaying his debts, and among these debts, the issue of dowry is one of them.

Another issue that causes disagreement among families is the issue of forgiving the dowry. If the dowry is the responsibility of the man, whether it is ten, fourteen, twenty gold coins, or a certain amount of money, whatever it may be, it is his responsibility. If the woman forgives him, they call it “Ibrar-e-zameh” (forgiving the debt). After that, she cannot demand anything from the man.

Perhaps it may even be possible for legal documentation or proof to be used in a court of law to get the dowry paid, she may demand and receive it through the law. But from a religious perspective, if she has forgiven it, she no longer has any claim to the dowry.

Transcript of Audio:

اما ایکی از مسائلی که در بحث ازدواج مطرح می شه و مورد بحث و گفتگوی خانوادها قرار می گیره مسئله مهریه هست… اون چه که باید دقت بشه، مرد مهریه ای را بده کاره که عقد بر اون جاری می شه. ممکنه بعد از عقد کردن مهریه را افسایش بدن یا کم بکنن اون جنبه قانونی و بخشش اینها پیدا می کنه. ولی اون چه که عقد روی اون واقع می شه به احده مرد واجبه که پرداخ بکنه. حتی اگر پرداخ نکنه از دنیا بره، اول باید دیونه میت داده بشه، از جمعه موارد، همین مسئله مهریه هست.

 اما ایکی از بحث هایی که مورد اختلاف خانوادها قرار می گیره، مسئله بخشش مهریه هست. اگر مهریه به ذمه مرد باشه، حالا ده تا، چهارده ها تا، ست تا سکه، یا مقداری پول باشه، هرچی، به ذمه است، عین خارجی نیست، اگر زن او را ببخشه، به این می گن: ابرار ذمه.

  دیگه بعدن نمی تونه از مرد مطالبه بکنه، حتی ممکنه از طریق قانون اگر سند و مدرکی نباشه مطالبه بکنه و بگیره، اما از نظر شرعی، اگر ابرار کرد، اگر بخشید، اینجا دیگه چیزی از مرد طلب نداره.

Originally posted here.